Practical Steps to Success #20: Prevent Conflicts While Building Your Team

Practical Steps to Success # 20:

Prevent Conflicts while building your team

Verbal skills are so important when building a team. Miscommunication can present unclear objectives, trigger stress and foster a lack of respect for team players.

When I discuss personality dynamics in a workshop or talk, I relate behaviour to one of the five earth’s elements: wood, fire, earth, metal, water. These elements offer a unique insight on how people and things react to one another. Just as fire and water will naturally clash, it is common to find one person in your organization that is a ‘bee in your bonnet’.

The reality is, you are trying to do your best; often a simple question may come across as a ‘confrontation’ for the receiver. Rather than stress over the next interaction, I have a few communication tips that may fit with your dilemma. These options could change the tone of your actions.

1. Use the ‘Royal WE’. The word ‘we’ reinforces the team and invites collective responsibility. This also indicates there is no blame or accusation. (This also works very well in personal relationships!)

* ‘We need to remember the expense reports are due in on Thursday.’

* ‘We forgot to include a graph with the report. Let’s fix this.’

* ‘We gathered information about this issue last month; who will present our report at the next meeting?’

2. Give people an out. We are all busy, and stressed; which theoretically breeds negative or bad behaviour. If someone you need to connect with is acting more unprofessional than usual, you are allowed to call them on it. But, give them an out.

* Did you get a chance to look at my report yesterday, or is that deal with the lawyer taking up a lot of time? This implies that you understand conflicting deadlines. You may get an earful, but you still have a job to do. Listen, don’t reply. Stick to the topic: When will he/she be able to get back to your issue?

* Did you really mean that, or are you having a bad day? I’ve used this more than once and people are quick to grab on to ‘a bad day’. For the most part, their behaviour changes radically for the better. (Some people do blame the full moon.)

3. Offer a positive statement before asking a question. A positive remark can set the tone for the (perhaps) touchy subject and an opportunity to state sincere and positive feedback. A pause is suggested to give you a nano-second to breathe, wait for a nod or comment, and then continue.

*’That was a great observation you had about the tunnel. (pause) When can I get an update on the construction team?’

            *‘What a lovely morning outside! (pause) Will you be able to review my project notes before the meeting this afternoon?’

Good communication skills do need to be tailored to the individual and the issues of the day. Take the time to do your part and prepare for each day: get enough rest, think about what you need to say and perform your job earnestly. Life is too short to be stressed out every working day.

Let us all try to by-pass conflicts before they arise… and we will accomplish so much more!

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Take the Personal Element Profile (PEP) Quiz on my site: www.kathrywilking.com/resources/PEP

Kathryn of Kathryn Wilking Designs is an Author and Feng Shui Consultant. Her recent book; Practical Feng Shui for the Office, is available in e-book and paperback. Check out amazon.com or indigo.com

There are more Practical Solutions for Life at kathrynwilking.com

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About Kathryn Wilking

Author, Home Stager, Feng Shui Consultant

Kathryn has inspired women for more than a decade to take charge of their lives; arranging their environment, home and office, to support a positive, prosperous lifestyle. She provides informative tips and talks to organizations and small groups through her Facebook Group and Blog Posts and recorded podcasts. Contact her today for more info about bringing the practical application of Feng Shui into your space.

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